Rowing Is Not A Sport

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Postby [old] Don Seymour » March 10th, 2006, 4:42 pm

In case you were unclear on what the mainstream sports world thinks of rowing, this should clear it up. From Bill Simmons, Sports Guy (SG), on ESPN.com page2, a usually very entertaining and clever sports writer.<br /><br />-Don<br /><br />Q: Hey Bill, my name is Jon and I'm a writer for The Daily Collegian at UMass-Amherst. Last week I wrote an article that had to do with the crew team here and I seem to have pissed off a lot of people. I was wondering what you do when your fans get pissed off at you and send hate mail and death threats. Also, if at all possible, since the crew team has given me such grief, try to work them into your next article. Maybe something about how much rowing sucks and how it's not even a sport. Just make 'em hurt. I'd appreciate it._-- Jon B., Sharon, Mass.<br /><br />SG: Come on, it's the crew team. Settle down. What are they going to do, attack you with a broken Zima bottle? Keep in mind, this is a sport that is huge in Britain, and allows for the everyday use of the word "coxswain." And if you're rowing crew in college, this usually means one (or more) of four things:<br /><br />1) You suck at every intramural sport, as well as every video game and every drinking game, so this is really the only way you can find a competitive outlet -- by participating in a sport that's not even remotely fun to do (so the odds have been decreased because anyone with any semblance of coordination would rather be doing something else).<br /><br />2) You're looking for an acceptable excuse to get up at 5:30 a.m. on weekends so you don't have to be out drinking, partying or doing anything else that might result in you having a memorable experience in college.<br /><br />3) You were looking for an activity in which you need to be in phenomenal shape and routinely throw up, but for no real reason.<br /><br />4) You really, really, REALLY liked "Oxford Blues."<br /><br />(And by the way, if rowing is a sport, then "playing Madden while walking at 3.8 miles per hour on the treadmill" should also be considered a sport. So don't worry about it, Jon B. Stick to your guns. It's a free country.)<br />
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Postby [old] SlugButt » March 10th, 2006, 5:34 pm

I am deeply offended that anyone would suggest I might have liked the movie "Oxford Blues." Otherwise, let's see: stink at other sports, don't care much for staying up late and partying, phenominal shape, vomiting . . . hmmm, not a bad characterization overall. <br /><br />Still, I think the guy from UMass should be persecuted mercilessly for using the term "crew team," which is redundant. <br /><br />David<br /><br />P.S. Are you sure you should be watching ESPN? I mean, they don't show any rowing, do they? Gotta go, time to vomit.
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Postby [old] whp4 » March 10th, 2006, 6:47 pm

<!--quoteo--><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><div class='genmed'><b>QUOTE</b></div></td></tr><tr><td class='quote'><!--quotec-->Q: Hey Bill, my name is Jon and I'm a writer for The Daily Collegian at UMass-Amherst. Last week I wrote an article that had to do with the crew team here and I seem to have pissed off a lot of people. I was wondering what you do when your fans get pissed off at you and send hate mail and death threats. Also, if at all possible, since the crew team has given me such grief, try to work them into your next article. Maybe something about how much rowing sucks and how it's not even a sport. Just make 'em hurt. I'd appreciate it._-- Jon B., Sharon, Mass.<br /> </td></tr></table><br />For those curious about what "Jon B." said to tick everyone off, here are links to the articles/letters:<br /><br /><a href="http://www.dailycollegian.com/media/paper874/news/2006/02/15/Opinion/All-Bunched.Up.At.Boyden-1613010.shtml?norewrite&sourcedomain=www.dailycollegian.com&page=1" target="_blank">All bunched up at Boyden</a><br /><br /><a href="http://www.dailycollegian.com/media/paper874/news/2006/02/16/Opinion/Response.To.all.Bunched.Up.At.Boyden-1615024.shtml?norewrite&sourcedomain=www.dailycollegian.com" target="_blank">Response to 'All bunched up at Boyden'</a><br /><br /><a href="http://www.dailycollegian.com/media/paper874/news/2006/02/22/Opinion/Brandts.Gun.Show.And.Mens.Crew.Team.Collide-1622482.shtml?norewrite&sourcedomain=www.dailycollegian.com" target="_blank">Brandt's gun show and Men's Crew team collide</a>
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Postby [old] mumbles » March 11th, 2006, 7:51 am

1. Someone oobviously didnt make the 1st VIII.<br />2.The words "phenomenal shape" and "not a real sport" are rarely found in the same sentance.<br /><br />Owen<br /><br />P.S. I think if the author took a look at this forum, he would find that plenty of rowers are pretty damn good at other sports! :x
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Postby [old] PaulS » March 11th, 2006, 9:15 am

After reading the Original article and the responses, I think Bill Simmons was just having a bit of fun. He appears to be making fun of they guy asking the question and not the Crew. What was funny, was that the Crew apparently had even worse workout conditions than the whineycrybaby that wrote the original article was 'suffering' in, so they were going "uptown". LOL<br />(what 'gun show' are they talking about?) :roll:
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Postby [old] mumbles » March 11th, 2006, 12:00 pm

Good question Paul, gunshow thing? :?
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Postby [old] whp4 » March 11th, 2006, 2:01 pm

<!--quoteo(post=59028:date=Mar 11 2006, 08:00 AM:name=mumbles)--><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><div class='genmed'><b>QUOTE(mumbles @ Mar 11 2006, 08:00 AM) </b></div></td></tr><tr><td class='quote'>Good question Paul, gunshow thing? :?<br /> </td></tr></table><br /><br />Isn't the term "big guns" body-builder slang for heavily-muscled arms? A description which will never be used for mine! :(
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Postby [old] seat5 » March 12th, 2006, 1:48 pm

I was on the UMass crew in I think 1980. We did work out in the boiler room in the basement. It was dark, dirty, and really hot. It was like a stinking dungeon. There was a one seat tank and I hate to think what was in that water but you could hardly see down there so I guess it didn't matter.We had one erg. It was a Gamut and it was upstairs in this tiny winy little room--like an interogation chamber. I am not at all surprised the boiler room was condemned, I'm just surprised that they have been using that same torture chamber all these years! It was seriously hot down there before you even started to work out. I remember the dancers, who all smoked to keep their weight down, used to hang around in the hall outside the boiler room smoking like chimneys, which added to the general nastiness of the whole affair. The crews were seriously underfunded when I was there and I can see it has only gotten worse. I remember the women got the left over boats that the men's varsity had cast off. The women's novice boat was a two piece boat that joined in the middle. It was heavy and made of warped wood. The bow was twisted to port and the stern was twisted to starboard. <br /><br />Maybe we on the forum could help by setting up some sort of charity rowing challenge thing to help the UMass crew get a space that's decent? Anyone think this is a good idea?
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Postby [old] crewhead » March 12th, 2006, 4:20 pm

I bet you that guy couldn't finish 1000 meters on his 2k, and was so mad and so low on self-esteem he had to make fun of crew just to get his self-esteem up.<br />
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Postby [old] Carl Henrik » March 12th, 2006, 4:44 pm

<!--quoteo(post=58954:date=Mar 10 2006, 09:42 PM:name=Don Seymour)--><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><div class='genmed'><b>QUOTE(Don Seymour @ Mar 10 2006, 09:42 PM) </b></div></td></tr><tr><td class='quote'>And if you're rowing crew in college, this usually means one (or more) of four things:<br /><br />3) You were looking for an activity in which you need to be in phenomenal shape and routinely throw up, but for no real reason.<br /><br /> </td></tr></table><br /><br />No real reason for being in phenomenal shape? - Hah! :lol: 8)
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